103 - #NOELWATCH

Warning: This episode includes new Noel Edmonds content. Do not say you have not been warned... Of course we do have other things in the show we'd love you to know about. Like when we sample the lovely edible Japanese treats as given to us at our recent live show... However, people want to know about Noel (Sodding) Edmonds. We'd love to fill you in on some of the weird savoury treats on offer. But Noel has joined the ITV show "I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!" so now we have to tackle it! There's also a gross Japanese chicken face mask to wear too... And again, that damned infamous "cuddly" UK TV show presenter and "disc jockey" has to drop a bomb on us about his "other female confident". Will we ever be rid of The Edmonds?

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088 - THE HISTORY OF THE NOEL PART TWO: ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

Enough is enough! We have to end this relationship with Noel Edmonds, one way or the other... and it's not going to be pretty! Paul and Eli finally lift the flaps of Britain's most infamous and cuddly light entertainer's private life and get stuck into some of the more untoward parts of his career. Hopefully we may never need travel back to Crinkly Bottom again.

However, it's not all Noel talk this week, in fact you get a healthy dose of regular CheapShow content for your troubles. We are promised some "pet corpse" stories and BOY do we get some. Paul gives himself over to Jimmy Biscuits and pays the price. Eli reveals something shocking that could ruin the cheap eats section of the show forever and a slanderous theory is put forward as Eli gets off on Noel's balls. It's the usual podcast oddness!

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082 - THE HISTORY OF THE NOEL: PART ONE

Noel Edmonds. The man, the myth, the beard. Is he a talented, misunderstood, everyman of the entertainment world? Or just a mad, desperate lunatic who feels he should be considerably more famous? You decide... As we finally tackle the topic that's been hanging over us for so long.

In this episode, Paul & Eli look at Noel's beginnings, read a rather crap interview with Noel from a 1975 Top of the Pops annual and then throw themselves into Crinkly Bottom... Kinda... they play the Noel's House Party board game... and end up with tired out wrists!

But then... why is this Part One? Is there more to come in the future? Sadly, there may have to be...

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070 - ABBOTT & EDMONDS' MADCAP MUSIC TIME

We promise, we will never talk about Russ Abbott's singing career again. Mostly because we have run out of stuff to criticise! In Episode 70 we take one last dip into the world of cheesy light entertainment music and discover a long long Abbott "classic". We also find something MUCH worse. A rare vinyl single. Introduced by "rumoured human" Noel (Tidy Beard) Edmonds. It's not good. Elsewhere in everyone's favourite economy comedy podcast, Paul & Eli argue over more Tales from the Dancefloor, Paul sounds like he is giving up and Eli decides to do something filthy to make things worse! It's not all grime, as Eli takes us once more into his Country Noodle Kitchen and rates, tastes and reviews some "cup noodles" from a range of leading, and not so leading, brands. Will Paul join in? Or will he just decide to do a pretty poor impression of Eli doing his old stand up routine? We think you already know the answer to that one!

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064 - A CRINKLY BOTTOM WEREWOLF IN LONDON

It's finally happened... The curse of Noel Edmonds has struck and has dreadful ramification on the whole show! The latest episode of the world's best and probably ONLY trash based comedy podcast returns with all the usual bells and whistles. Elsewhere, Eli tries to bring back the classic "Price of Shite" format but Paul seems determined to ruin it by pointing out as many flaws in Eli's logic as possible. There is also a very special edition of "Silverman's Platter" where the CheapShow Chaps dive, track by horrible track, into 1980's light entertainer Russ Abbott's cringe worthy album "I Love A Party". It becomes a feat of stamina. They also uncover one of the most unsettling kid's music singles ever and a random B side about... making a cup of tea? All this and much much less in Ep 64!!

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055 - HoP 6: "STORY TIME HELL"

Once Upon A Time there were two naughty boys! Two wicked boys with nothing too. One lived in a happy halfway house, the other in a house built on pickles & despair. One night they spoke about such wondrous things. Things that would set your hairs standing on end and boggle your mind... Of naughty Noel Edmonds and his horrid house party... Of sexy adventures in a house made of fun... Of bizarre life hacks designed to make living easy... and of magical dice created to tell tall tales that you'll have never have heard of before. Because they are bloody awful.

Welcome, to CheapShow's most random House of Pickles ever!

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052 - HOUSE OF PICKLES 5

We venture onwards with our 5th trip to the House of Pickles, the supposed "mini" episodes that just keep on getting longer and longer! In this new audio adventure, Eli & Paul wax lyrical about the loss of the word "bastard", fail to create two new segments for the show, come up a cropper when they decide to pinch someone else's Life Hacks and Noel Edmonds is given yet more of a verbal beating. Also, Patreon donor Jordan Richards joins the Cheap Chaps for another chat where we discover Eli's fear of Ikea, talk the birth of Barshens, tackle YouTube scumbags and even dip their ignorant toes into Sci-Fi!

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051 - LIFE IS CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP

This should not have been Episode 51. Noel Edmonds made us do this. We can only apologise profusely and hope you can forgive us... We watched "Cheap Cheap Cheap". For our sins we watched it, so you never have to.

This episode begins as a commentary track for Ep01 of "Cheap Cheap Cheap" but quickly and horrifically devolves into something unforgivable. Eli was WAY too ill to sit through an hour of Noel Edmonds and it nearly breakes him. In turn, that nearly breaks Paul too. We will all be sorrier for the experience. We can never apologise enough. All opinions and immature accusations are obviously us taking the piss. Please do not make us lament having to write that last sentence. We feel bad enough.

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You can see pictures and accompanying videos for this episode on our website www.thecheapshow.co.uk

f you want to get involved, email us at thecheapshow@gmail.com And if you have to, follow us on Twitter @thecheapshowpod or @paulgannonshow & @elisnoid If you like what you hear, please spread the word! Like, Review, Share, Comment... LOVE US!

050 - THE BIG FAT POWER BOTTOM EPIC SPECIAL DELUXE

This is it! This is the big one! Our BIGGEST one yet! To celebrate somehow reaching episode 50, we have gone big AND we've gone home. Back to the House of Pickles to record this mammoth pointless milestone of an episode!

We are joined on this special occasion by two very special guests. Ash Frith comes out from behind a phone line to join us face to face and he is accompanied by Richard Sandling, who was there at the very beginning when CheapShow was stupidly called The Uncliqueables.

So how are we stuffing this episode? Well... Paul & Eli tackle your questions in a bumper #AskCheapShow segment that quickly goes off the rails and causes some mathematical confusion in the process. This also gives everyone the chance to look back over the past 49 podcasts. There is a mind blowing "Tales From The Dancefloor" that questions reality in more ways than one. We revisit Paul's "FrothShop" for more cheap eats from Gannon's fictional candy emporium. We revisit "Bobby's" branded snacks and take on their range of budget maize crisps. The results are quite surprising... especially Paul's new "FrothShop" voice.  We play another bargain board game based on a TV show format with Noel Edmonds' "Telly Addicts" which annoys Eli, upsets Ash and throw Richard for a loop. There is also time for "Silverman's Platter" where he delivers two odd musical curios, one which puts us back in Eurovisionland and one that makes us want to die inside. And as an aside, Richard brings along a very rare VHS. Finally, CheapShow delivers the most ultimate "Price of Shite" ever.

It's full of shocks, surprises, twists and also features possibly THE most awesome/awful piece of charity shop shite ever seen on the show. It's one that the charity shop itself thought it would never sell! The outcome will SHOCK you. We also get a few hellos from past CheapShow guests... some who were less keen to come back then others, albeit very briefly! So download, relax and enjoy the biggest Power Bottom of a podcast CheapShow has done to date...

Warning: Contains added Noel Edmonds. Who is now our enemy. But why...?

(With HUGE thanks to David Milner for his brilliant new CheapShow introduction theme!) And if you like us, why not support us: www.patreon.com/cheapshow Share & Enjoy. Subscribe or Die!

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And if you have to, follow us on Twitter @thecheapshowpod or @paulgannonshow & @elisnoid as well as our guests @squat_betty @Ashfrith @patsharp @damienstjohn @bwecht @ashens @EggsyGLC

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